August 23, 2011

Staying home vs going to work...the never-ending battle.

I am really interested in hearing from parents (both women AND men) on how they made the decision to stay home with the kids versus going back to work.

Now that I am nearly done with my maternity leave for my second child Dylan, I have made a realization.

Staying home is a hell of a lot harder than going to work.

For one, the at-home work day never ends and there is really no way to make the out-of-the-house "working" spouse understand that.  For instance, my hubby comes home at five after getting up at four a.m. for work.  He's tired.  I get that.

But I have been doing at least three overnight feedings, PLUS I'm the one getting up to let the two year old pee AND explain that we are not "napping", but SLEEPING, which means at least nine hours of shut-eye. (got it kid? no, I didn't think so.)

Not to mention that staying at home AND being a good parent is just plain tough.  Yeah, I could plop my daughter down in front of the boob tube day after day.  But then I'm a crappy parent who is letting the idiot box teach my child.  Trying to figure out what to do with a toddler that is physically and (even better) mentally stimulating is EXHAUSTING!

And yes, kisses and hugs and seeing your child grow into a smart, polite, twinkle-of-your-eye kind of kid is great.  But overall, staying at home can be a very thankless job.

Did I get a bonus when I spent an entire weekend cooped up in the house potty-training my daughter? Where was my gold star when I was able to take BOTH kids to the lake and not have either of them drown OR eat sand??  I just got a lukewarm reaction from the husband, who (might I add) has NEVER gone ANYWHERE with both kids by himself. (easy my ass!)

So as I get ready to head back to work, I realize that emotionally it will be hard.  There is nothing that can compare to watching your child grow before your very eyes.

But I also have to get away.  Criticize me all you want, but I NEED time away from my kids to just be me.  (Who cares if I spend most of that time talking about my kids??)

I truly believe going to work can help me be a better mother.  Since I will be able to focus on something other than housework and kids, when I am at home, I will cherish that time even more.

Where do you stand?

1 comment:

  1. Staying home is a lot harder than going to work...or should I say exhausting! I am a former Adv Exec from one of your local competitors:-). It's tough, and I do miss the camradery, challenges, and yes, the "stress" that my job offered me. Now a "work-at-home" Mom, It took me a while to find my value and worth that I thought I had lost when leaving a corporate job.
    So, head back to work! Enjoy it! and LOVE coming home! Your time with your kids will be even more valuable and you will cherrish every second together. Working Mom's ROCK!