I'm not calling Jerry Sandusky a victim, BUT....

Before you get mad, let me go on record by saying that I completely believe Sandusky is a monster. What he did to these young boys is reprehensible.

But WHY is he this way?


I don't know Sandusky's entire life history or whether he was abused as a child. But I wouldn't be surprised if he was. Because sometimes, just sometimes, this kind of abuse can lead to the victim eventually becoming an abuser themselves.

(READ: I AM NOT SAYING THE VICTIMS IN THIS CASE WILL BE ABUSERS. But it DOES happen)

Now I have no idea what it is like to be a victim. I cannot fathom the nightmares these children and adults have to live with for their entire lives.

But most of the time, when I hear about the early life of an abuser, they were abused themselves. When abuse happens, especially when someone is very young, that can give them a very screwed up view of relationships, love and right versus wrong.

So that is why many victims may turn to drugs, may commit suicide or sadly,even start abusing others.

It doesn't make it right. I'm not saying it does. But I will admit (and you are free to disagree) that a little part of me still tries to see the tiny, abused child that is living inside the body of a monster.

Kids bullying adults is unacceptable

By now, many of you have probably seen the video of a bunch of New York school kids tormenting a bus monitor.  They call her fat, make fun of her glasses and say such awful things that I actually had to turn the video off because I just couldn't believe my ears.

The woman, who is 68 and the grandmother to 8 children, was brought to tears.

So was I.

It got me thinking.  What do I have to do as a mother so someday I won't see my own child be a bully?  And not just a bully of other kids...but adults too.

I can't imagine what it must be like for the parents of these kids to see their own children behaving in such a despicable way.  Are they humiliated?  Are they angry?  Or do they not think it is a big deal?

In my opinion, Marley is not old enough for me to show her the video.  I don't believe she would fully understand the situation and I don't want to introduce that kind of hate (yes, HATE) into her consciousness.

But when she is a few years older, I probably will.  I will show her and explain to her how sad that woman is for being treated so unfairly.  I will also explain that children feed off one another.  When one starts talking and acting badly and get a few laughs, others will join in.

It's peer pressure at its worst.

I hope and pray my child will be kind.  I am working my hardest to raise her that way.  Whenever someone does something mean to her, instead of focusing on what the other child did, I ask her to focus on how it made her FEEL.

People want to feel good.  They want to feel loved.  And I want Marley to remember how it FEELS when someone treats her badly, so she will think before she treats someone else that way.

As for the parents of those school kids, I hope they are taking the time to really explain why their behavior was so wrong.  I know it's easy to focus on the (national) humiliation, but the real message should be that a woman was made to feel like dirt and those kids had NO RIGHT to treat her that way.

Baby shampoo mislabels babies as potheads

This is another "you've got to be kidding me!" moment.  Apparently bathing your baby in certain shampoos can end up leaving your little tike with a dirty drug test.

I'm serious.

And these shampoos aren't some obscure brands.  I'm talking about Johnson and Johnson and Aveeno.

A study out of the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill found a high rate of babies in its nursery were testing positive for THC, which is the get-you-high ingredient in marijuana.

So after doing a number of tests, researchers discovered that baby shampoo was causing the false positive tests.

It is still unclear why this is happening.  It could be a combination of factors.  But researchers believe soaps or shampoos containing polyquatrnium-11 and cocamidopropyl betaine (memorize these...there will be a test later) could be causing the problem.

There are several states that consider any prenatal exposure to illegal drugs a form of child abuse.  And if a couple admits previous drug use before pregnancy, hospitals may consider them high-risk and test their newborn.

Can you imagine?  You smoke a doobie here and there, but quit when you find out your pregnant.  Then as they hand you your newly-washed newborn, they also call CPS on your ass because your baby tested positive for pot!

Are you listening?

Anyone that knows me or works with me or spends even a few hours with me knows I like to debate.  I am a Puerto Rican-Italian woman with a mind full of opinions and some pretty loose lips.

But that doesn't mean I won't listen.

This is especially true when it comes to being a mother/parent.  I am NOT an expert.  But I am someone who has two kids of my own and has seen my fair share of tantrums, giggle fests, poopy diapers and underwear (!), vomit in the bed, cuddle time, teething pains, etc.

So if you want to come and ask me what I think about breastfeeding, vaccinations, rashes and more...I can share from experience.

But if you want to talk about "having the talk", bullying, teenage drug use, driving priveleges and other things I am sooo looking forward to, I can only talk in the abstract.  My children are three and one.  I have (hopefully) many more years before I have to worry about sex, drugs and rock and roll.

Still, I love having debates about these topics.  Okay, okay...I haven't actually gone though them.  But I truly believe that talking and debating about what I HOPE I would do will help me (and you) better manage the situation when the time actually arises.

I'll admit that I have conversations with my children when they aren't actually there.  I practice what I will say when they come to me with relationship problems, religious questions and body malfunctions.  I really don't think I'm the only one.

And that is why I have this blog.  I love to write and I love to express my opinions.  But I also LOVE the feedback I get from those who read it. Whether on this blog or more often on Facebook and Twitter, I feed off the feedback.

So now that I think about it...I want my own talk show.  About parenting. It would be so much fun!!

Could you imagine hearing my voice everyday?

Oh wait... ;))

You will not silence me (or my mom)

Being in the news business, I read and hear about all kinds of crazy things.  But some things really boggle my mind.

I just heard a story about seniors being denied their high school diplomas because of excessive cheering by family members during graduation ceremonies. In one case, a mother was actually ARRESTED for cheering.

WHAT?!? Good thing the "cheering police" weren't at an awards ceremony I attended a few years back.  My parents, who are always proud of me no matter how old I am, WANTED to come and see me pick up a couple of awards for a radio series I did.

And when my name was read not once, but twice, my mother was screaming and cheering so loud, I actually had to give her a look to make her stop.  (not like she did!)

I understand that graduations can take a long time, especially when you factor in cheering.  But after four years of high school...the tests, the dances, the possible bullying, the extra-curricular activities...parents and students deserve some loud cheering.

It is a fabulous feeling to jump up and down and celebrate life's great accomplishments. Shame on schools for trying to silence the joy.